Bond(i) beach

Who knew Brad Pitt had a stupid beard, or that Tom Jones has white hair?

Yes, it's a Friday night and I'm sat at home watching Tomorrow Never Dies. No money and free wine, so it works for me.

So I was thinking about what I want to do in life, what I want to experience. The list is so big. How can I travel with no ties, experience love and save the world at the same time?

So my ideal life would probably be working flexible hours, helping firms/governments to work better and more efficiently towards a sustainable environment whilst living on a beach, enjoying exotic skies and learning to surf.

Is that achievable? At what cost?

The Bucket List

Or, the Suicide List.

Okay, slightly dramatic (flair for the flamboyant here), but honest. If you ever wanted to end it all, screw fate in the eye and wave goodbye to a future what would you miss out on? What would you hate to miss the chance to do?

I started my list and it's helping me to define what I want out of my career and my life.

In no particular order:

1. Learn to dance, wow an audience. I don't care if it's a dingy little salsa bar or a wedding ballroom- I want to learn to dance. I can't really not, not when my grandfather fell in love with the dancing feet of my grandmother before he even saw her face.
2. Speak at least two languages fluently. I've got English pretty much covered, but I so admire those who can communicate in more than their mother tongue.
3. Make a difference. My great-uncle saved the Peregrine Falcon from extinction with his identification of DDT back in the day and I want to live up to that.
4. Have a hot, sordid and definitely intense love. I'm 23 and the past has either been a bit 'meh' or I held back too much. I want to lose myself, my heart, my mind- and be caught by the man who caused it.
5. Learn to ride a motorbike. My mother has banned me from doing so. Perhaps it is for this reason that I feel so drawn to the leather, the power and the speed.
6. Rally driving, full throttle through the forest. Enough said.

The list is not exhaustive, but there appears to be a theme- excitement and development.

Collated all my blogs. Fairly pointless having 3 when I really just need tags. Duh.

My life so far- my heel is throbbing after wearing stupid shoes to an interview and scraping of a 10p sized chunk of skin off said heel. And no, they weren't stupid because they were fashionable (miss) high (miss) or even remotely too tight (miss). They just rubbed.

Which brings me to my second point, that of shoes. As a girl of 5'9" and a not unreasonable size 9 shoe size (any smaller and I'd topple over more often than at present) why can I not find shoes that fit? Today I spent 4 hours in town trying to find a size 9. Of the 8 shops I tried (there was a lot of wandering in between them) only two stocked a size 9 at all. Of these two, one had a limited range (3 of the 9 styles I liked came in a size 9) and of those 3 only one was actually ever in stock (and the sales lady told me once it was sold they weren't re-stocking) and it was too narrow. The other, sadly, stank of child labour and Impulse body spray but did have an impressive array of size 9 shoes AND a separate wide fit section which also went to size 9. How do size 10 girls do it?! I came away with one pair of boring, uninspired, fairly cheap black shoes. One day Jimmy Choo, you will make a size 9 and it will fit and I will be able to afford it.

In other news I have developed an unhealthy addiction to a certain US cop show, and wish now to forget my previous endeavours and become a glamorous detective.

Failing that, I had an interview yesterday and the bloke told me to call HIM after I'd had a think. Hmmm. New way of getting staff? Very weird. Something doesn't smell right and after recent work-related disasters I'm wondering if I should listen to my gut.

Since I handed in my dissertation (4th Sep, 3 days before the deadline check me out for once!) I've been applying for jobs. Career jobs. Even if they are starting positions making the tea. I don't care as long as I can work my way up and pay off my loan at the same time.

I got rejected from my dream job- developing links between Embassies and science research abroad. Sadly I didn't get feedback as to why I failed, despite requesting the information. Some firms are so busy it's not helping the little people clawing to get in.

Nevermind though. As my tutor said, get in then go sideways. A bit like crabs, but slightly more welcome at a party. Hey, I ORGANISED the party.

(I did - MBS Summer Ball 2009.)


Sorry for my writing style tonight, teensy bit hyper for no apparent reason.