Change in pace

I'm bouncing with glee, and more than a little trepidation. Who would have thought that I'd be shortlisted for a PhD at a top uni, eh?

Anyway, excited though I may be, there's still a small matter of two further interviews, liking the research topics and finding the funds to pay a month's rent and flights.

Yesterday I was contacted re: a temp job, not one I had applied for but money is good, right? Today they told me I may start tomorrow, it depends if they can free the finance director for long enough to sign off the contract for extra help. Ironic, non?

Today I received another call from a brand new agency wanting to chat to me about working for a Times Top 100 company. Ace. I might see them tomorrow, if I'm not temping.

Alongside this complete lack of success in finding a job I've been caught by Generation Kill. Now let's just put this in context: I'm a 23 year old female with no interest whatsoever in war films, documentaries or mockumentaries. I can fire a gun (thanks to a diligent and equal opportunities granddad) very well but have no desire to fire a gun anywhere near people.

I'm gripped. I kid you not. I am hungry for the next episode to see what these inhuman, deliquent, highly trained, emotional wrecks are going to do next. I desperately want Nate to come out okay. I want Brad to stop with the gratuitous shirt-shucking (okay, that was a lie!) and for Rudy to continue with his Starbucks-inspired fashionista parade through Iraq. The script is exciting. It's disturbing. But most of all, it gives a totally different look at the challenges faced by the individuals in the war.

Added to the news yesterday that five of our troops were shot whilst training the native police force by an undercover insurgent and I'm suddenly feeling more connected than I've ever been to a conflict. I have renewed respect for our boys out there. And I'm feeling horribly guilty about that because I'm a pacifist. A middle class, university educated, PhD-considering bleeding heart.